A little free advice

Back in the “olden” days when life was simpler, there was just one event that was far and away the crowning accolade of adolescence and the literal rite of passage into adulthood. It was the prize we had worked for and pursued every year since we first sharpened our yellow No. 2 pencils on that first day of first grade. It was a long journey punctuated by all the things that combined to make us who and what we were; good or bad, smart or not, ready for the world or a little unsure. Graduation finally arrived; we waved goodbye and took a hesitant step into an unfamiliar land. No matter who you are, or how well you have planned, the day after graduation is the point when you start making the decisions for the direction of the next part of your journey. Those first decisions may be minor ones but each decision, large or small, random or studied, sets a course for the future and moves you a couple of steps further down a road of many, many miles. It is sometimes surprising how those decisions come about and the long-lasting effects they can have.

In this commencement season, I think the best advice I ever heard given to any new graduate was to “just be yourself”. Simple, but profound. Somewhere along the way, we have all acquired varying portions of the basic knowledge of “all combined human intellect”. Some obviously more than others, and some not so much as you would even notice. What really matters is how we use what portion we actually have . That’s what sets people apart. Being yourself requires that you first learn who you truly are. You rely on what you have learned and what you have experienced. If you are honest with yourself, then there is no better advisor to you than you. If you can do all of that then you will also find that you have a lifetime supply of self-confidence as part of the deal. Another bit of advice deals with the realities of life. It has been said that plans without deadlines are only dreams. That applies to just about everything. To be successful requires discipline of self and purpose, but drive and ambition must take a back seat to the boundaries of reality. Don’t confuse what is possible and what is not. Be realistic in setting your goals and deadlines. Remember the tortoise and the hare story. Speed is good, but turtles live for decades, rabbits are lucky if they make two years. Life is not easy and if you are ever stumped, and you will be, there are two sources that you can always consult. The first, without question, is the Bible. The next one is, in my opinion, anything ever written by Mark Twain. There is something by him that addresses almost every human situation you can find yourself in. One of my favorite quotes focuses on how people treat each other. Twain said, “Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you would rather have talked.” So, don’t discount the thoughts, opinions, suggestions and ideas of anyone until you hear them out. That is especially true with your parents. Just about everything your mother or father ever told you turns out to be true, and the longer you live, the more you will believe that and the more you will appreciate it. Finally, take a little credit yourself for where you are right now. You have worked hard to make it. At this point the future is yours to make it what you will. It is always good to enjoy yourself, but just as important to respect yourself. Now, get out there and get started. Congratulations, Graduates!